BREATHE AND PUSH !

I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT MORE GOD COULD WANT FROM ME. I BELIEVE I'VE BEEN DEPLETED OF EVERY IOTA OF STRENGTH, TO WHERE I REALLY JUST WANT ALL OF THIS TEST, TRIAL, AND WAITING STUFF TO BE OVER.

IT SEEMS AS THOUGH NOTHING GOOD IS EVER GOING TO COME OF THIS PATH I'M ON. EVEN THOUGH I BEGAN WITH THE THOUGHT THAT I WAS IN GOD'S WILL I ADMITTEDLY QUESTION THAT ON OCCASION.

IF I WASN'T SO SURE OF THE VISION INITIALLY, I WOULD HAVE LONG AGO ABANDONED THESE SEEMINGLY DISMAL HOPES.

WHY AM I HERE? WHY AM I STILL HOLDING ON TO NOTHING? IT'S AS THOUGH THERE IS SOME INVISIBLE FORCE HOLDING ME 2 THIS PATH, AN UNSEEN BARRIER PREVENTING ME FROM CROSSING OVER INTO MY OWN WILL.

I'M BACK TO THIS INSANITY QUESTION AGAIN. THERE ARE TIMES I GENUINELY QUESTION MY SANITY AS TO WHY I AM STILL WAITING 4 SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T APPEAR REMOTELY CLOSE OR EVEN POSSIBLE TO HAPPENING.

I'M MAD ENOUGH TO QUIT, BUT 2 AFRAID TO MISS OUT AFTER HAVING WAITED SO LONG.

PERHAPS UNLIKE YOU SPIRITUAL GIANTS, I QUESTION GOD IN MY FRAILTY. I ASK HIM, WHAT DOES HE WANT, WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS 2 ME, WHEN WILL THIS END?

THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER IS I AM ACTUALLY 2 MENTALLY. EMOTIONALLY, AND SPIRITUALLY TIRED TO EVEN WRITE, AND COMPLETE MY THOUGHTS OR THIS DEVOTION.

IT'S THAT UNSEEN PULL, THAT FORCE THAT MAKES ME QUESTION MY SANITY PUSHING ME TO THINK, TO WRITE, TO FOR SOME REASON HOLD ON TO THIS VISION I'VE ALL BUT LOST HOPE IN EVER COMING TO FRUITION.

TIMES LIKE THIS HELP ME REALIZE GOD'S WISDOM, BECAUSE IF GOD HADN'T HAD THE FORESIGHT AND WISDOM TO CREATE A ROUND WORLD, TIRED, DISTRAUGHT PEOPLE LIKE MYSELF WOULD BE LINING UP TO WALK OFF THE END OF IT.

I HAVE READ, BELIEVED, AND TAUGHT THE WORD OF GOD THAT INSTRUCTS US TO "HAVING DONE ALL, STAND"(EPH 6:13),"I WILL NEVER LEAVE THEE, NOR FORSAKE THEE"(HEB 13:5)"IF GOD BE FOR US, WHO CAN BE AGAINST US"(ROM 8:31)

THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER IS THAT BEYOND READING, BELIEVING, AND TEACHING THESE TRUTHS IS THE MORE DIFFICULT TRUTH OF LIVING THEM.


1Co 9:27 But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.

PAUL SUMS IT ALL UP IN THIS STATEMENT FOR HIMSELF, YOU, AND ME, THAT WE MUST CONTINUE UNTIL THE END AS NOT ONLY PROMOTERS OF THE TRUTH, BUT ADHERENTS.

I MUST CONTINUE TO HOLD ON TO THE SEEMINGLY IMPOSSIBLE ODDS, BELIEVING THAT I AM ON GOD'S PREDESTINED PATH. THIS WHILE CONSTANTLY PRAYING FOR HIS DIRECTION AND REASSURANCE.

WE MUST ALSO KEEP OUR FLESH, AND/OR MIND UNDER SUBJECTION THAT WE DON'T BEGIN TO USE OUR OWN RATIONALE, AND REASONING OR THE ODDS WOULD DEFINITELY CRUSH OUR HOPES CAUSING US TO BE CASTAWAYS, OR LOST FOR LOSING OUR HOPE.

SO IN CLOSING, I GUESS I'LL CONTINUE ALONG THIS LONG, ARDOUS PATH THAT SEEMINGLY ONLY LEADS ME FROM CALAMITY TO CALAMITY, CONTINUING TO CAUSE MY QUESTIONING OF MY SANITY. I'M SURE I'LL BE PRAYING AND HOPING FOR IT'S SOON END, AND ASSURANCE THAT I'VE BEEN ON THE RIGHT PATH ALL ALONG.

LETS NOT GET ALL THE WAY TO THE NINETH MONTH AND THEN ABORT WHAT WE CARRIED, NURTURED, FED, AND CARED FOR WITHIN US TO THE DELIVERY ROOM SIMPLY TO CAST IT, AND OUR PURPOSE'S AWAY.

TIMES, AND TEST ARE SO FREQUENT, LIKE BACK TO BACK LABOUR PAINS, AND SO DEVASTATING, LIKE THE OPENING OF THE BIRTH CANAL BECAUSE WE REALLY HAVE BEEN ON THE RIGHT PATH, BUT CARRYING TIME IS OVER, AND IT'S TIME TO BIRTH.

PUSHING HURTS, BUT PUSHING BIRTHS, DON'T YOU WANT TO FINALLY SEE THE BABY YOU CARRIED FOR SO LONG, YOUR VISION?

IN THE NATURAL DELIVERY ROOM THEY'LL INSTRUCT YOU TO BREATHE, AND PUSH IF YOU WANT TO HELP THE BABY, BUT THE EXERCISES ARE MORE FOR YOU THEN THE BABY, BECAUSE THAT BABY'S HEAD POPS OUT SOONER THEN YOU WANT SOMETIMES, WHEN IT'S TIME THEY COME OUT, WITH OR WITHOUT THE MOTHERS HELP.

IN THE SPIRITUAL DELIVERY ROOM INSTEAD OF BREATHE AND PUSH, GOD TELLS US FAST AND PRAY. THIS IS MORE FOR US THEN THE VISION, THE VISION HAS SHOWN IT'S HEAD, BUT IF YOU WANT TO HELP IT COME ALL THE WAY OUT, THEN WE MUST BREATHE AND PUSH OR FAST AND PRAY.

BOTH THE NATURAL AND THE SPIRITUAL BIRTHING ROOM EXERCISES ARE DESIGNED TO SHORTEN THE TIME OF PAIN AND DISCOMFORT FOR THE BIRTHER, NOT THE BABY OR VISION.

2DAYS PROPHETIC ADMONITION: DON'T GIVE UP NOW ! KEEP PUSHING, KEEP PRESSING, KEEP PRAYING, KEEP HOPING.

THOSE OF US AT THIS STAGE OF THE GAME MUST REALIZE THAT WE LEFT THE LOBBY AWHILE AGO, WE ARE ALREADY IN THE BIRTHING ROOM AND GOD IS COACHING US TO VICTORY THROUGH OUR CONTRACTIONS(TEST/TRIALS).

IF WE WANT LESS PAIN WE MUST BREATHE AND PUSH, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN FAST AND PRAY MORE.


I PRAY GOD'S PEACE N MERCY B UPON U AND URS !


G-TEP aka K.J. DUMPSON